One Bad Day or Why I Hate Reaver (end game spoilers)

I officialy hate Reaver. Seriously. Why, you might ask. He is you’re ally, isn’t he?

It all started when I returned to Reaver. He took one look at me, smiled and said with a straight face “My, you look a bit worse for wear.” And that was only the beginning. As he continued he slowly reveals that he had sold me out to Lucien. Damn.

Unfortunately for him, Lucien wanted his head too. So together we fled down his super secret passage way through several underground chambers where we confroned badies of a most vicious sort, finally coming to his hidden cove with escape ship waiting. Escape ship for him that is. he could care less for me and my companions (who had spontaneously appeared on the beach).

Well that plan went down the drain when a Great Shard showed up and blew it to smitherines. Take that, you egocentric bastard!

Battle ensued and soon the four of us had defeated the Old Kingdom super weapon and teleported safely away to the Guild Hill in Bower Lake, where we began to summon the weapon that would defeat Lucien once and for all. Then Lucien himself decided to join the party and we discovered we hadn’t put out enough chairs.

He quickly made room for himself though, and teleported everyone else away. Just him and me then. He proceeded to inform me of the tragic death of my wife and kids (by his hands, no less), shoot my dog, and then attempt to shoot me. Thankfully I was saved by a mysterious flash of light.

When the light cleared,  I was a kid again and in a nice comfy bed somewhere in the country side. Wait, what?

I got out of bed and there was my sister, alive and well, and acting as if nothing had happened. Confused and befuddled I clambered out of my bed and went on to shoot bottles, kick chickens, kill beetles, and have a general all around good time. Night came and with it the song of a music box. Against my sisters begging and pleading, i followed the sound of the box untill I heard her screa. I turned and saw she was gone. There was nothing left for me but to continue onward.

I collected the box and after a brief montage of quotes and memories found myself in the Tattered spire again, only this time I was well armed and prepared. I approached Lucien, who was draining away the power and abilities of my companions to fuel his giant wishing rod, and stole his power from him with the music box. I then held a gun to his head while he said his last words and, in mid sentence, Reaver pulls out his pistol and shoots him, knocking him backwards into the pit and depriving me of my much deserved revenge.

I hate that man. I truly, truly do. I was numb as i wished for the lives of all those who lost their lives to the Spire to be restored. I hate that man. He’s far away, out of my reach now. One day, he’ll return. And I’ll be waiting.


~ by Pickapok on November 2, 2008.

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